If there’s one constant about being a blogger, for me at least, it’s that you’re always behind.
Granted, it’s been less than a week since my last post, and to be fair, I often lose track of what day it is, but it does still feel like forever since I’ve posted any meaningful photography on the blog… And that bothers me.
A lot.
Hell, last night, my now (apparently) yearly crisis finally came to a head. I wonder where my work is going, why it’s not getting anywhere and what I should try to make some semblance of progress with it.
Deep depression usually follows. The praise I get no longer means anything, because I look at all of my work and I think, “Everything I have, sucks.”
Whatever standards I’m reaching for are just beyond my reach.
Always.
And just like an avalanche, all the rest comes crashing down as well. Should I try something new? And what’s that? What am I doing now that isn’t working? How in the world do I find time for this stuff anyway?
That last one has actually been a serious problem. I shoot a lot of weddings in the summer. I have to pay the bills, though fortunately for me, and unlike many other photographers wanting to break into the big game (advertising, fashion, editorial, etc), I unapologetically and genuinely enjoy shooting weddings. Yes, it’s routine and repetitive, but the people are different, and I love me some people. I’m not a recluse, I’m not anti-social, I’m not a loner; I love people. And weddings provide me with a lot of those. So like with anything else I do, I give 500% of myself to my work.
The problem is, that leaves very little room for anything NON-wedding related. Especially in the summer. Between that and a host of major troubles in my personal life which, of course, happened to take place during what little down time I had (ie. the non-wedding-season months), I feel like I’ve hit a dry spell that has lasted a year and a half…
The solution that I came to, very late last night, is far from groundbreaking or exciting or somehow inspiring in its own right. Plus, the solution always seems to be the same:
Just shoot more.
So now the goal becomes to hash out a plan where I can do just that. Hopefully you’ll notice the results over time.
While you wait, here’s a model shoot I did recently. The best is already on the website, but here’s a few outtakes:
[...] is a model I’d had the opportunity to work with before. She was wonderful and I immediately knew we had to try working together [...]